Epic TMI Question List:

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer?
All of it - wait, no: No dryer, it was the washing machine.

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why:
Good. Because... it was good?

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed:
Vampirella? I don't think i'm good in imagining fictional characters sex abilities so i pass on this question.

4: Something that never fails to make you horny:
Breasts. I love breasts.

5: Where is one place you would never have sex:
Anywhere where it's too cold. I don't like it, when it's cold.

6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when
... i really think about this, but either there never was something that awkward to remember it or i really have successfully repressed it into oblivion.

7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny:
I don't think i can relate to something as "weird", when it makes me horny.

8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]:
Cloth. Like a belt of a bathrobe. You can pull it tighter without injuring the other.

9: What is the fastest way to make you horny:
I don't like it fast. I love teasing and i love when the tide rises slowly. On the other hand, i react to the usual things: sexy lingery, high heels and suspenders, corset, posing naughty...

10: Top or bottom?
Top.

11: We were about to ____________ but then ______________
I can't think of anything fitting.

12: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary?
None of all. It's ok to have an orgasm ore some or none. As long as the sex is fun and pleasant.

13: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:
Some sort of porn, like everybody else, i guess? But ut's not really hidden, it just doesn't lie around openly.

14: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you:
My very few nicknames were quite usual until now.

15: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex:
I like the taste and the instant reaction to it and i disklike having hair in my mouth and nose (because tickling turns me off).

16: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:
Again the word "weird". I really can't tell something that fits in my definition of "weird", but for others this could be a threesome in a crowded party.

17: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]
Yes. It was ok.

18: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:
Sure it is. But you have to trust the other and the other has to trust you that it is ok.

19: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had?
First class, Frau Bauer. She was sweet.

20: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:
Sushi. Sushi fits to everything, i guess.

21: How big is too big:
If it hurts when it shouldn't.

22: One sexual thing you would never do:
I don't know. I can say "no, thanks" beforehand if something doesn't fit in my mood.

23: Biggest turn on:
Breasts (haven't i already answered this?)

24: Three spots that drive you insane:
Tigh, neck, shaft of my penis.

25: Worst possible time to get horny:
At work.

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans:
Yes.

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had:
I don't know, i always try to be very careful how i treat others so everything turned out to be at least ok until now.

28: How much fapping is too much fapping:
I don't know either. Too much of anything is not good, right?

29: Best sexual complement you ever got:
"You're a sex god". Yes.

30: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji:
I like shaven because i like oral, on the other hand i don't impose my taste on others and it doesn't matter in the end.

31: Is it good sex if you don’t nut:
My english leaves me here. Let me google this... ah, ok. Yes, absolutely. But i have already answered this question as well.

32: Fill in the blank: "If they ____________, we are fuckin"
Huh?

33: What your favorite part of your body:
My Hands

34: Favorite foreplay activities:
Licking

35: Love (>,<, or =) Sex For those of us who don’t remember our math thats “greater than, less than, or equal to]
Is there a sign for "is a different thing but if both comes together it's the most wonderful combination you can have"?

36: What do you wear to bed?
Nothing or a T-Shirt

37: When was the first time you masturbated:
I guess at 14. I was a quite normal teenager, i think.

38: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?
Nude yes.

39: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?
Yes, but it's been a while. Sex outside is not so great because most of the time the outside is quite uncomfortable to have sex on.

40: Have/would you ever have sex outside?
It's the same question, right?

41: Have/would you ever had a threesome?
Yes, but it was interrupted and i would really like to have this again for a while longer.

42: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?
I guess this question is directed to women...?

43: Have/would you ever masturbate at work/school?
At school, if i remember right. But i rather like to be private for this, so: not interested.

44: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane?
No. I wouldn't decline it but i guess it's not very comfortable to have sex on a plane. But on the other hand i just don't know yet.

45: What is one song you’d like to have sex to?
Actually i'm not the 'sex with sung music' at all type because i would listen to the text and this would be very distracting. But i don't mind some soft instrumental music.

46: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny?
Actually, music in a lot of forms. Generally, music helps me to get emotional. But i would have to put it off or change to instrumental music when the real thing starts.

47: Most attractive celebrity?
Salma Hayek

48: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?
Sometimes. Because i'm courious.

49: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now?
It wouldn't be born yet.

50: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online?
No... i guess.

51: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny?
When someone licks her lips teasingly. It does not only not turn me on but turns me off.

52: Do you have stretch marks? (How do you feel about them? Has anyone ever had a problem with them?)
Yes, on the knees. I don't care as anyone else.

53: Do you like giving head? (why/why not)
I really like to lick - wait, is that a question for women, too?

54: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?
If the tattoos are beautiful i like them.

55: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?
Not especially interested.

56: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?
Cookies. Really, don't.

57: Is there anything you do on the internet that you would not like your significant other to see?
Nope. If there's something i wouldn't want anyone to see i wouldn't put it on the internet in the first place.

58: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?)
Yes, several. And i buy some now and then. Because i like playing with toys.

59: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day?
Why not, but they wouldn't be interested in it, i guess.

60: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery?
No. But i'd be wondering.

61: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?
No.

62: Do you watch porn?
Yes.

63: How small is too small?
I don't know.

64: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?
Yes. Because of having been a classical nerd in school.

65: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?
My friend and yes.

66: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day?
Why should we do this? We wouldn't be available for our friends and there is nothing really interesting in switching phones anyway.

67: Do you feel comfortable going "commando"?
I'm not sure what that means.

68: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn't shaved their pubic hair?
No. I like it better without the tickling though, but generally no.

69: If you could give yourself head, would you?
Tried it (i was much more flexible when i was much younger). Was not very interesting.

70: Booty or Boobs?
Boobs first, then booty.

71: If you had a penis/vagina, what would you name it?
Penis/Vagina

72: Have you ever been on an official date?
No.

73: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)
Yes, one time (i define cheating to have sex with another person and not telling your partner, right?). Didn't feel good at all, even after admitting it shortly after.

74: If you were a stripper, what would your name be?
I wouldn't have one because noone would want to see me strip.

75: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?)
No and i have my own bed thank you very much.

76: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed?
I think this would be kind of impossible because my bed is the exact opposite of what they would find comfortable.

77: What was your reaction the first time you saw a vagina
I liked that.

78: If you had a vagina for a day, what are five things you would do?
I think i would try all the obvious things (masturbating, getting licked, trying a dildo, trying to squirt, trying a hitachi) just to see how it feels best - and then i'd use the new knowledge - Ha!